TOP
TEN HELPFUL HINTS
FOR
NEW AU PAIRS
10.
ADMIT IF YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. Let your family know if the language is a problem.
Admit if you don’t understand a word or directions.
Ask questions. Relax –
your English will improve rapidly during the first few weeks, and after you
become accustomed to the family’s routine, you’ll find that the number of
questions will decline.
- SHOWER
OR BATHE REGULARLY. Most
Americans value cleanliness as a virtue.
Families expect that their au pairs will bathe or shower regularly
and change into clean clothes daily. Deodorant
is also helpful.
- BE A
GOOD EXAMPLE. The children you
care for look up to you. Don’t
you do things in front of the children that their parents wouldn’t want
them doing.
- BE
CONSIDERATE OF YOUR HOST PARENTS. Keep
them informed of where you are going. If
you are planning on traveling, discuss the details with them and make sure
your plans do not interfere with their schedules.
- FOLLOW
HOUSE RULES. The only way you
will establish trust is by following rules – even those with which you may
not agree.
- NEGOTIATE
FOR CHANGE. If you have a
problem, present it to your host parents clearly and calmly.
Suggest your solution to the situation.
Listen to what they say. Try
to reach a compromise.
- RESPECT
THE PRIVACY OF OTHERS. Gossiping
about other au pairs and their families may be very harmful.
If your friends confide in you, honor the confidence.
Do not tell your host family about what goes on in other families.
- TAKE
RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR ACTIONS. No
one is perfect. If you make a
mistake, take responsibility and try to correct the situation.
- BE A
GOOD “BUDDY”. Remember what
it is like to be a new au pair. Welcome
new arrivals.
- STAY
IN TOUCH WITH YOUR LCC. Call if
you can’t come to a meeting. Let
us know if you’ll be out of town. Most
important, call if you have a problem.
We like hearing from you!
What Annoys
Host Families?
- Showing
up for work late or not ready to take over. The primary complaint is that au pairs wake up a few
minutes before they are supposed to start and have not showered, dressed, or
eaten breakfast when they are supposed to start. Remember that your work hours are exactly that – work
hours. You are supposed to be
watching the children, doing chores or driving to pick up the children.
You can’t do this if you are still getting dressed or eating.
This means that starting your breakfast when you are supposed to be
watching the child is not ok. Also,
if you appear on the scene on the exact moment you are supposed to start, it
doesn’t give your host parent any time to give you instructions before
they go out the door.
- Eating
habits and costs. Most families
are very accommodating in buying food for you that you like or giving you
some money for food that you desire. Some families feel that au pairs either A. Eat everything
in the cabinets or refrigerator without asking, or B. buy expensive food
with the host parents’ money. Please
be sensitive to the fact that there are others in the house and that perhaps
some special food has been purchased for a party they are having or for
special needs of the children. If
you are unsure about what you are allowed to eat – ask!
Also, if your host family allows you to use their money/credit cards
to buy food – then please realize that this money is not limitless – you
should not be constantly buying expensive prepared foods, snacks, sodas and
candies with your host family’s money.
Make sure you give them a receipt from the grocery/drug store and ask
them before you buy things if it is ok for you to buy certain things you
like. You should be willing to prepare some of your own meals
(if you aren’t eating with the host family).
Your host family is responsible for feeding you but that does not
mean that they have to pay for the most expensive option or for every extra
sweet snack you desire. You are
supposed to use your pocket money for this. Also, if you eat with your host family – please make
sure you help with dinner in some way (either cooking or cleaning up).
- Rushing
out the door at the end of the day or hanging around the host families too
much. Either extreme is
generally not good. Host
families want you to have fun and go out and host parents occasionally need
their privacy, so give them some space if you find yourself at home a lot.
On the other hand, if you are running out the door the second you are
done with work every day, this is also not good.
It sends the message that you are only here to socialize with friends
and don’t want a relationship with the host family.
Each family is different in their expectations.
Remember that many host families will not tell you that you are in
the way or that you should stay home or eat dinner with them sometimes.
They feel uncomfortable saying these things and worry that you will
either go out more or stay home more but will resent it.
The best bet is to strike a happy medium.
Also – remember that most host families LOVE to hear about their
kids and enjoy it when you tell them something fun you did with their kids
or something good or helpful their kids did. This shows you like being with their children and makes
them feel you are doing a good job. Reserve
negative comments about the kids for times the children are not present.
What Host
Parents Love:
Au Pairs who:
a.
Are cheerful and talkative – ones who tell them about themselves and
about what they do with the kids
b.
Ask questions – ask if they are doing a good job, and if there is
anything they need to improve on.
c.
Do things without having to be asked.
They do everything they are supposed to do without having to be reminded
and even anticipate host parent’s and children’s needs.
d.
Occasionally do extra things they are not required to do (ie.
Cleaning up a room in the house, vacuuming out the car or helping out with the
kids when it isn’t your official time to work).
Usually these “extras” are appreciated and you will see host families
doing extra for you too.
(I
can't take credit for writing this..it was given to me by another LCC - but it
is still good advice)
